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| Kidou Keiji Jiban Movie; needing a little help! | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jun 1 2011, 04:23 AM (993 Views) | |
| 鋏ジャガー | Jun 4 2011, 10:46 AM Post #11 |
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Scissor Jaguar
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Dark_Crono, here's a list of the 39 revisions that are the most necessary. I'll start going over the less important ones later today, and I'll post them when I'm done. It has the original line, and then my suggested revision is in parenthesis next to it. Of course, if you have any questions about any of them, let me know, and we'll discuss them. Also, Line 193 is a really tricky one, because the movie doesn't explain that Mayumi jumps down the waterfall because if Jiban gets any closer, the finger bomb will explode, so people watching it aren't going to know that she jumped to avoid blowing up Jiban(she even screams "Farewell!" when she jumps). I went with, "Stop, don't come any closer!" because it implies that there is a reason he shouldn't come closer. |
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| jigen | Jun 4 2011, 11:35 AM Post #12 |
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Advanced /m/ember
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Actually for these two lines self-destruct device sounds a bit more menacing than self-destruct mechanism, googling the two phrases device came up in close to a million pages, mechanism in around 550,000 pages Line 227 - Self-destructing device, switch on! - (Self-destruct mechanism, switch on!)\par Line 228 - \{\\i1\}Self-destructing device activated.\{\\i0\} - (Self-destruct mechanism activated.)\par actually think useless works a little better for a mad scientist's rant against god here but what's really needed is a 'the' in front of ultimate, he's not just making monsters but the ultimate monsters. Line 126 - I will re-create your useless humans into ultimate monsters, - (I will turn your worthless humans into ultimate monsters,)\par |
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| sky79 | Jun 4 2011, 05:11 PM Post #13 |
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Advanced /m/ember
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he was the one, that killed shiro's family .. in serie. or at least, he's responsible |
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| 鋏ジャガー | Jun 5 2011, 08:20 PM Post #14 |
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Scissor Jaguar
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Here is the final list of revisions, the minor ones are below the major ones. Also, I put the three recurring issues in their own section at the top, for easy access. 1. "Officer Yoko" - (Youko Senpai) Lines 69, 84, 93, 269 and 271 2. "Ultimate Monster" Lines 126 and 155 3. "Sis" - (Onee-chan) Lines 131, 132, 238, 239 and 240 1 and 3 need a more accurate honorific, and 2 just needs an alternative. In it's singular form, "The ultimate monster" it sounds perfect, but in it's plural form, "The ultimate monsters", it sounds a bit off to me. All of the other adjectives I could think of(peerless, supreme, super, mega, etc) all sound bizarre in the plural sense as well, so the only thing I can come up with is, "Ultimate monster army". I know it's a slight deviation from the original Japanese, but it fits the plural sense pretty well. Line 126 - I will re-create your useless humans into ultimate monsters, Line 126 - I will turn your useless humans into the ultimate monster army, Line 155 - They're raw material for our ultimate monster experiment. Line 155 - They're raw material for our ultimate monster army. Jigen, I looked it up, and it is indeed ハーケンクラッシュ(Haaken Crash). Here's a link to the page(It's [2] at the top of the page): http://senki.kusakage.com/setume/jipan.htm For the honorifics issue, I nominate "Officer Katagiri" and "Big Sis". Anyone else have an opinion? |
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| jigen | Jun 6 2011, 12:23 AM Post #15 |
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Advanced /m/ember
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I have to disagree with changing these lines to say army, it's fine when translating to add what is needed to convey the original meaning, it's something different when you are inserting words that were never part of the original. Line 155 is completely changing the meaning, as an experiment and an army are in no way similar. Also never does it indicate if they are making 1 or more than 1 monster, so the ultimate monster is perfectly acceptable, especially if it truly is the ultimate you really do not need more than 1. Line 126 - I will turn your useless humans into the ultimate monster army, Line 155 - They're raw material for our ultimate monster army. Shiro's need for being turned into a cyborg was because of the injuries he sustained saving the double rider's from the anti-cyborg ray set as a trap for them. He did try to kill Tachibana later on. He also almost killed Shiro, thus necessitating the cyborg surgery which turned him into V3. Seriously, three murders and one attempted murder is pretty hardcore for a kaijin. |
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| Dark_Crono | Jun 6 2011, 01:52 AM Post #16 |
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/m/ember
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Thanks, jigen and Hasami! I'll look these changes with the translator and then make the final script. Thanks a lot for all your work. Expect the movie to be released on June 16th, the sub's anniversary. We also plan to do other one-shots with dual subtitle portuguese-english, and the next one will be Tokusou Robo Janperson Movie. I can't say when it will be done for QC since I'm terribly busy with a lot of other projects in the sub (all of them with portuguese subtitle), but when it get done, hope I can have a little help again here at the /m/subs. See ya. |
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| Dark_Crono | Jun 20 2011, 12:48 AM Post #17 |
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/m/ember
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So, gentlemen, here is the final release! Thanks once again for all your help! Movie - http://www.megaupload.com/?d=SRMV9DBW More information - http://daigeki.fansubers.com.br/projetos-d...ji-jiban-movie/ Like said before, I'll work on Janperson Movie next, so I hope I can get a QC help on it too. Anyone that want to help us with more dual subtitle projects (english translation), will be more than welcome. See ya! |
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Jiban_Movie___Revisions.rtf (5.05 KB)
8:56 AM Jul 11