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What Others Need
Tweet Topic Started: Jul 9 2008, 05:12 PM (288 Views)
kismetrose Jul 9 2008, 05:12 PM Post #1
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So, for a while I've been wanting to run White Wolf games (namely psychics and vampires) in the setting I've been developing for the purpose. Things have gotten in the way, caused delays, and there's still more work to be done. But generally, when I have the urge to run something, I try to strike while the iron is hot. I don't mind putting a game on the back burner and getting to it later; we have several campaigns in rotation.

But Valefor's been telling me that he's getting into more of a D&D mood for a little while. He's stopped running his Changeling game and stopped talking much about White Wolf stuff. He says he's still open to playing a WW game but he's been looking at D&D stuff more, as well.

It looks like I'll be running for one other player for a while, and he's been having a really rough go of it lately. I mean, he's had to deal with a lot in real life and I get the feeling that he would love some high fantasy ass whuppin', something simple and more magically-oriented. I have an intuition that now is not the time to roll forth into another WW game with a good deal of moral ambiguity and probably a good dose of the darkness of humanity, no matter how I've been itching for it.

And it's not like I haven't gotten D&D ideas in the interrim. I sometimes get a random flash of an idea and write it down for further use. I'm starting to think that I should pull out ye olde D&D books and refresh myself a bit. But I need to ask if he'd like to play in the not too distant future, in the first place, and if my intuition is onto something. I feel silly asking about that now, given his circumstances. I am trying to think of what my players want, though. I may have to wait a while. I'd just like to get some work done in the meantime.
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Hexeter Jul 9 2008, 09:05 PM Post #2
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One of the many hats a DM often had to wear is that of pseudo-Social Worker from time to time. Many years ago I gamed with a Husband and Wife team and there were some nights when they'd get into outright screaming matches at one another right at the table with the rest of us.

I do enjoy getting to know my fellow gamers in a non-gaming setting but I guess I am a little bit old fashioned. There are just some things your gaming group should not see or hear especially from a couple. In your case you are fortunate that you may be able to remain friends with both of your Players even if one of them stops coming.

My wife and I have a tacit agreement that when we are gaming with people we do not bring up personal matters for any reason. She was surprised when I told her that was how I wanted it to be but when I explained my past experience with other 'Couple Gamers' she totally agreed.

I've had boyfriends and girlfriends play in my games, break up, stomp off, return and make up all in one game session. Every time it happens I tend to take it to heart and offer my services as an impartial mediator if needs be. I guess that is part of being a good GM, people come to trust your ability to be fair in things.
Among the long shadows live I, living the lies and destroying the light.
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Hexeter Jul 9 2008, 09:20 PM Post #3
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As for the game changing I was always pretty flexible when it came to my groups desires but I often would find myself enjoying one system more than another not for the mechanics but for the stories I could weave. I once wrote out a fairly long story arc for my Blackwood campaign that ended up never getting used because the group decided they wanted to give Spacemaster a try.

I suppose it's another indicator of a good GM that it doesn't bother me in the least when my Players want to do something else. I still have as much fun creating things.
Among the long shadows live I, living the lies and destroying the light.
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kismetrose Jul 9 2008, 09:46 PM Post #4
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One of the many hats a DM often had to wear is that of pseudo-Social Worker from time to time.

Yeah, I've worn it a number of times over the years. That just comes with dealing with people for any extended period of time.
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Many years ago I gamed with a Husband and Wife team and there were some nights when they'd get into outright screaming matches at one another right at the table with the rest of us.

I had a couple that I gamed with online about a decade ago. They would bring all of their resentment into the game reguarly, and argue in chat rooms until they soured the whole session. Sometimes the husband would come home and take out his day on his wife in a goddamned chat room. I couldn't believe them. When I got to talk with them on the phone, it was more of the same. They really did yell like that in real life. What was worst was when they tried to drag bystanders into their marital situation. It was almost like they did it on purpose, mostly because they wanted folks to pick sides, and the other gamers just wanted to play. I had it up to here with that online; I can't imagine having to see that at my table, in my house.
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I do enjoy getting to know my fellow gamers in a non-gaming setting but I guess I am a little bit old fashioned. There are just some things your gaming group should not see or hear especially from a couple. In your case you are fortunate that you may be able to remain friends with both of your Players even if one of them stops coming.

I like to game with friends. I find it much more fun and comfortable than gaming with strangers. And our friends have generally been good about not arguing in our house, whether it's game night or not. It seems like they didn't want to bring their home troubles to the game, or to show them to us. We've been gaming with them regularly since 2000 and we've become good friends. I have gone out of my way not to pick sides or provide ammunition, as much as I can, because I am a friend to both of them. I'm going to do my best to remain so, but I know that it's not just about me. I'm hoping that they'll both be cool with it.
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My wife and I have a tacit agreement that when we are gaming with people we do not bring up personal matters for any reason. She was surprised when I told her that was how I wanted it to be but when I explained my past experience with other 'Couple Gamers' she totally agreed.

You know, I don't recall if Valefor and I ever really had a conversation about it. When we're at a game we're in game-mode, which shuts out most everything else.
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I've had boyfriends and girlfriends play in my games, break up, stomp off, return and make up all in one game session. Every time it happens I tend to take it to heart and offer my services as an impartial mediator if needs be. I guess that is part of being a good GM, people come to trust your ability to be fair in things.

Overall, I've had good games while gaming with couples. I have learned, however, that I would rather not have to meddle in other people's relationships. Those I've encountered don't really appreciate it, don't really want it, and it causes a lot more headaches for me. I can deal with game-related problems, but people's romantic attachments are their own to deal with. That, and in this case I'm not really impartial, I guess. I think they're losing something valuable and worth working on.
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