| Welcome to The Outside Course! You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free. Join our community! If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features! |
- Pages:
- 1
- 2
| Depression; advice? | |
|---|---|
| Tweet Topic Started: Oct 6 2012, 07:37 PM (1,015 Views) | |
| FlashGordon | Oct 7 2012, 06:06 PM Post #16 |
|
You're BANNED!
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
JF, you are not a nut at all. You have been through a lot... with all you faced with Ty, then your ex-boyfriend, and now your job. I think you've had a full plate. I do agree having some level of sadness/depression is probably to be expected, and normal. Maybe you have some kind of PTSD? As Kassandra said, you suffered a pretty intense betrayal. However, I would definitely consider therapy/counseling. If nothing else, it gives you an outlet and a sounding board, and it may help you work through your feelings. Also, a counselor can sort of keep a gauge of how you are doing, and refer you for medication therapy if they deem it necessary. I have two close family members that suffer from mental illness, one has bi-polar and the other has chronic depression and anxiety. These were pervasive issues that affected their life negatively for decades. They have both sought treatment in the last year and the difference is truly shocking, in a positive way, and both did lament the fact that they had not sought treatment sooner. I also have another family member who has occasional depression/anxiety and goes on meds every once in awhile, and then is able to come off them. So, I guess my point is, there are all levels of depression and once in awhile you DO need to try some meds... but it is a decision you should come to with your physician and your counselor/therapist. Don't be afraid to reach out if you feel your depression is at a point that truly needs to be addressed. Also, consider lifestyle--- don't drink while you're depressed, make sure you are eating, sleeping, and exercising. Those things are just as important to treating depression as meds and talk therapy. Anyway hang in there, and yes as RR said we are all here for you! Sending loads of hugs your way my friend! |
![]() |
|
| Deleted User | Oct 7 2012, 07:04 PM Post #17 |
|
Deleted User
|
I have been where you are. I just wanted to say, big hugs. I don't feel comfortable posting personal information on this board anymore, but I'm absolutely happy to talk to you via pm if you want to hear how I dealt with things and how things are going. It can, and will, get better with time! |
|
|
| Indy | Oct 8 2012, 06:12 AM Post #18 |
|
You're BANNED!
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
|
![]() |
|
| JumpTheMoon | Oct 8 2012, 06:26 AM Post #19 |
|
Off visiting Candy Cave, be right back.
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
This. And wine and mexican food in 24 days. I'm so sad I didn't realize things were this rough for you, but it WILL get better! Start "dating" some therapists if that's the only dating you do right now, and find one you really like. I really think it will make a huge difference! |
![]() |
|
| Won for Me | Oct 8 2012, 07:24 AM Post #20 |
|
Is the meadow on fire?
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
JF, how old are you? I think this is really common for women in their late 20's. Everyone else seems to be "on track" and depression sinks in for those who seem to be on a different track (even if it is in their own mind). I went through it and probably the only time I would call it clinical depression. It wasn't pleasant, but I came out stronger and more sure of myself than ever. I did talk therapy with the wrong person and antidepressants. I didn't need them long, but it helped me through the rough spot. Other times in my life have been "situational" depression episodes. I know what is causing it (life goes through a sad spot) and those times are better to get through because you know you will feel better eventually. Have you ever seen that really strange blog called Hyperbole? The blogger is pretty out there, but recently went through a bad state of depression. She explains it better than anyone else I have ever read. It is just one post, but she talks about how she got there and how she came out the other side. Search for it. You will feel not so alone.
|
![]() |
|
| Corey94 | Oct 8 2012, 07:31 AM Post #21 |
|
Off visiting Candy Cave, be right back.
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
You are in my thoughts, JF. I think the advice has been spot on, and I'm so glad you were honest in your post. It takes a lot to concede to those feelings. It is maddening to be in spot where you can't 'snap out of it!' on your own. Please pursue another therapist; I've heard it may take a few initial visits to find the right one... persisitence, baby! You are your best advocate, and you deserve to be happy!
|
![]() |
|
| WhySoSerious | Oct 8 2012, 08:59 AM Post #22 |
|
Off visiting Candy Cave, be right back.
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
Many, many hugs to you. I can relate to your situation in a lot of ways. Here are a few things I've done so far to try and "feel better" if you will. Last year is June, my emotions had gotten really out of hand and it was not only affecting me negatively, it was affecting everyone around me. I went to the doctor and was prescribed an anti anxiety medicine to take the edge off. It did help, but it did not go to the root of the problem. This year about the same time, I found myself really depressed and unable to function. It was largely due to the fact that I decided to sell my horse. So I started going to counseling. I feel like it has helped, but retraining how you think about things is difficult. Some days when I go there, I don't want to talk. Which doesn't help anything. Of course not too long afterward, I decide I want to talk about my issues, but a day late and a dollar short I guess. I've also gone to my doctor again and she has offered me the anti depressants again. Honestly I'm not sure if they would help or not in this particular instance, so I'm just sticking to the counseling at this point. I feel like it's very helpful to have an objective person to talk to. Talking to friends or my husband can be helpful, but what they have to say is just way too subjective sometimes. I truly feel like depression and anxiety will always be an issue for me, but I am trying to get control of it now so that I can live a better life. I don't like admitting I need help, so going to the doctor and the counselor was difficult for me to do. I'm glad I did though. Keep your chin up, as hard as it may be. You'll have good days and bad days. It may take a while, but things will get better. Don't stop living your life, even though it may seem like it's the hardest thing in the world. You can do it. |
![]() |
|
| Little Diva | Oct 9 2012, 05:00 AM Post #23 |
|
You're BANNED!
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
OH JF .... I wish I were closer so we could spend some time together. I know EXACTLY where you are and how you are feeling -- my year has been a challenge as well, to put it mildly. The one thing that has kept me on track has been speaking to a counsellor. A lot. We started with twice a week and then down to once a week now. It has helped a lot, more than I can say and all I can do is echo what everyone else has said and find a counsellor who can help. I am here for you any time if you want to speak/vent/cry. |
![]() |
|
| stephjm | Oct 9 2012, 08:20 AM Post #24 |
|
It'll be an adventure! We're going on an adventure!
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
JF. I second the counselor and meds if you need them. I have had post-partum mild depression/anxiety and that was bad enough. Seek help, and do things for yourself that you really enjoy.And know that we are here for you.
|
![]() |
|
| SnackPack | Oct 9 2012, 08:27 PM Post #25 |
|
You're BANNED!
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
Hey JF: I just wanted to add some more to the mix.
|
![]() |
|
| Jersey Fresh | Oct 10 2012, 05:11 AM Post #26 |
|
Off visiting Candy Cave, be right back.
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
Thank you everyone. I talked to my mom on Monday and she wants me to go talk to someone. I told her I feel like I'm a basketcase because i cant get my life in gear and its all little things that shouldnt bother me. She just kept saying I needed to get it undercontrol. I told her I felt guilty going to Europe next month with my friends, because I really cant afford to go. I didnt know what else to do to make myself happy about something so i booked the trip on a CC (so unlike me) just so I had something to look forward to. She told me i better not cancel the trip and I needed to go with them and leave my blackberry at home for the 10days. I needed a break and that was the best thing to do right now. And to worry abotu the money later (again very unlike my mom to say that because she is very prudent with money). I was up last night worrying (again) about work. I dreamt my staff members got fired without my knowledge. I felt my heart start to race when I saw my bosses car in the parking lot. Thats not normal and I think I am finally at the point where I realize I need to get the anxiety about work under control. Its not normal or healthy. The only good thing is while I'm really upset about how the guy who just dumped me handled it (a freaking text message?? really.) and I'm hurt, I feel a strange sense of relief in that area of my life. I have since Monday and its still there. I think that means he wasnt the one, since my intuitiion is usually spot on. I'm working on fixing everything else now but I am going to go talk to someone. This isnt who I am and its not who I want to be. I feel like a stranger to myself most days. |
![]() |
|
| Boston | Oct 10 2012, 05:30 AM Post #27 |
![]()
It'll be an adventure! We're going on an adventure!
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
JF I am glad to hear you are going to go talk to someone. Also, I think the Europe trip will be really good for you. Leave everything behind and enjoy your time with your friends in Europe. I think you have a very good outlook on your situation and good for you for recognizing that this isn't you. Don't forget you are not alone!
|
![]() |
|
| Kassandra | Oct 10 2012, 06:28 AM Post #28 |
|
Is the meadow on fire?
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
Have fun in Europe, I think it's just what you need. Anxiety is a really funny thing, but no fun to deal with that's for sure. I used to suffer from it a lot 20+ years ago, and I had a pretty crazy bout myself reticently when I switched jobs TWICE in 3 months, then went and bought a new horse and a new car all within the same months. I spent a really large amount of money, thought I had destroyed my career at one point, and increased my monthly expenses a lot. All that was IMO just too much for my system to take at the time, and I ended up having pretty bad anxiety attacks in the BART trains on the way to my new job. Serious out of body, I am going to lose my mind, I gotta get off this f'ing train, anxiety. I don't know what the moral of this story is except that sometimes the stress just gets to us and we break. I just had to slow down, breathe, and do a lot of meditation. BTW, did you watch the Oprah show with Jason Russell who had his break down? It was a really great interview, again just shows you want can happen when we don't take care of ourselves. So be kind to yourself. |
![]() |
|
| Reynard Ridge | Oct 10 2012, 12:26 PM Post #29 |
|
Drivin' The Short Bus
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
Sounds like a really grand idea to talk to someone. And I'll second what Kassandra said, take care of yourself. Stress and anxiety wreck havoc on us physically, so while your brain is making itself spin in circles, it's not doing anything good for your physical health. Is there any chance of doing any kind of regular exercise right now? I'm not suggesting training for a marathon or anything, but can you join a regular yoga class and make some new friends, or maybe join a running/biking/walking club, just something to help you get out and get some endorphins going? The benefits of exercise on mental health are still not fully researched, but, let's face it, there's no harm in adding exercise to your "return to great mental health" routine. I'm not a proponent of holidays on credit cards, BUT, there is a time and a place for splurging. It sounds as though you need a break, taking one with friends sounds like a grand idea. Now, just have a plan in place to pay off the card, and enjoy yourself. Edited by Reynard Ridge, Oct 10 2012, 12:28 PM.
|
![]() |
|
| 1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous) | |
| « Previous Topic · The Hay Loft · Next Topic » |
- Pages:
- 1
- 2





![]](http://z1.ifrm.com/static/1/pip_r.png)





7:24 AM Jul 11