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Ok, I'm Finally FREAKING OUT
Topic Started: Sep 28 2010, 01:56 PM (1,336 Views)
SidesaddleRider
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Is the meadow on fire?
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RHowell
Sep 29 2010, 09:36 AM
I just got an email this morning from the venue saying that some high profile meeting requiring privacy is going to be taking place in the main house, so that we cannot use the changing room set forth in the contract and will be provided a hotel room instead and will need to be ushered from our room to the wedding site--um, not happy. Don't want to feel like cattle at my wedding!
WHAT?!?!?!

That would make me seriously peeved... not to mention have me arguing for a price reduction on the facility rental, as they are certainly NOT comparable things. Talk about a breach of contract...
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Indy
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RHowell
Sep 29 2010, 09:36 AM
I just got an email this morning from the venue saying that some high profile meeting requiring privacy is going to be taking place in the main house, so that we cannot use the changing room set forth in the contract and will be provided a hotel room instead and will need to be ushered from our room to the wedding site--um, not happy. Don't want to feel like cattle at my wedding!
WTF? I think this is when you get to put your bridezilla hat on and do some name taking and ass kicking.

If the other client requires privacy then you require a discount. A deep discount. They agreed to a contract with you and if they're not going to hold up their end of the deal they need to compensate you more than with a lousy hotel room changing area.
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bellaluna
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Magical Leopluridon
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Congrats RH! I think you're doing alright if you've held off on the freak outs until now! :psycho:

I'm so jealous you're having your wedding next weekend. I think this is absolutely the most beautiful time of year. I had wanted a fall wedding but oh well, wasn't to be! I was getting stressed trying to make everyone happy with the planning (a problem I have) and once I focused on the meaning of the ceremony, the role of family and friends in the event (and life in general) it really helped give me perspective.

I'm sure even if you're busy and rushed and a couple of things don't get done you'll have a wonderful, meaningful day. :cloud9: :hug: :cloud9:


Don't forget to share pictures!!!!
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RHowell
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Thanks everyone. I'll let you know how "roomgate" turns out, but now that I have one unanswered email and three unanswered VM's I've just left one for her boss. Not.Happy.

Bella, I've been focused on the meaning of the ceremony the whole time--it's just in the last week that I started worrying about making others happy so I think I'm going in the reverse of you :innocent: My family doesn't really care or have opinnions on anything, it's more my concern about everyone being comfortable/sitting with people with whom they will enjoy their time and making sure nothing is too too cheesy. I've also had some table issues--seating is HARD. What I've learned from it is that no one will be entirely happy and they just have to deal--they don't get to pick their tables so don't even listen to them when they tell you who they want to sit with.
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Reynard Ridge
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Drivin' The Short Bus
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:teehee: Roomgate.

Best of luck and have a terrific time! You certainly seem to have your head on straight about what is and what is not important. :yes:

Have a great time, and I am really hoping that you'll be able to post photos! I understand if you don't want to, of course, but I'm dying to see the dress!
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DairyQueen2049
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DRAGON BREATH. DRAGGIN' BUTT
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Deep Breath

DELEGATE as mentioned before
even delegate that horse shopper person

Do the nails, and your hair.

AND watch your all time fave movie at least once - esp if its a comedy. LET yourself get sucked into it deeply (wine helps this).

No fave? May I recommend "Meet the Parents" or "Meet the Fokkers"
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RHowell
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Reynard, you mean you want to see my lettuce wrap dress :teehee:

(that's what friends have been calling my vegetable died organic, free-trade silk dress )
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Trialbyfire
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RHowell
Sep 29 2010, 12:13 PM
I've also had some table issues--seating is HARD. What I've learned from it is that no one will be entirely happy and they just have to deal--they don't get to pick their tables so don't even listen to them when they tell you who they want to sit with.
You are so right. It's YOUR wedding and everyone will have to deal. Frankly, most people do just fine so DON'T stress out about it. We had to deal with my dh's brother who is estranged from his parents (that worked out fine) and also his newly "out" gay cousin who brought his significant other and they were AWESOME and appeared to have a blast, despite my uber Catholic MIL having a meltdown about it. So we just had to let his parents be uncomfortable, not us. It's not my problem that THEY have problems with other people. ;)

Agree on the delegating - give all your vendors a "go-to" person if possible that isn't YOU. I told my photographer up front that I didn't want to have to talk to him at all on my wedding day if at all possible. He was totally cool with that -- said "make me a list of pictures you really want, have someone point out the important people, and I'll stay out of your way and take great pictures." And he did. I think a lot of vendors prefer not to have you nitpick over them and it's so much more fun to be a "guest of honor" at your wedding instead of the hostess/director.

Hope the room thing works out ok. :luck:
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Reynard Ridge
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Drivin' The Short Bus
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RHowell
Sep 29 2010, 12:28 PM
Reynard, you mean you want to see my lettuce wrap dress :teehee:

(that's what friends have been calling my vegetable died organic, free-trade silk dress )
Yeppers! :clap:
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Little Diva
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Nothing to add here other than to echo what these amazing wise women have said -- delegate and get your nails done :)
You are going to be such a beautiful bride in your lettuce dress becuase you are just beautiful all of the time!

Did you get tuxedos for the two horses? They are in the wedding party right? And the dogs too of course.
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suniday
I Visited Candy Mountain and All I Got Was This Lousy Incision
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Do you have to do seating arrangements? I didn't because I didn't want the stress!

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jn4jenny
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Is the meadow on fire?
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Breathe deep! It's gonna be fine. Everything you've described is fixable, and frankly if it weren't your own wedding, you'd probably consider it trivial. I understand that you want everything to be as you've envisioned it, but remember, to everyone *else* the things you are describing are not nearly as important as seeing you happy, healthy, and with the person that you love.

While calligraphied seat assignments are lovely, but so are good ol' handwritten seat assignments by someone with nice friendly handwriting. Nobody's going to come to your wedding and go, "It was GREAT but jeez, they could have calligraphied my seat assignment dammit."

If the party favors don't show, there is always plan B. Put out a sign that says "In lieu of party favors, we have made a donation to [fill in charity group of your choice.]" You could even put out a jar if folks want to throw a few more bucks toward that charity.

If your haircut looks awful, that's why God invented good hairdressers and hair extensions.

And start telling yourself that it will be nice to have some barn time to put the wedding aside on the Friday before the wedding. That's a lie, but it's a convenient lie.
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RHowell
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I'm having them calligraphied because someone volunteered to do it--If I wanted to do them handwritten, then I'd be doing them myself. ;)

We decided to do seating assignments rather than a free-for-all because there were too many people who didn't know anyone there and wanted to sit them with people whom we thought they'd enjoy rather than feeling like the "unpopular kids" trying to hunt down free seats at other tables

I promise I'll post a picture

Oh and roomgate turned out fine--they're giving us an entire cottage and champagne.
Edited by RHowell, Sep 30 2010, 06:04 AM.
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Delia
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RHowell
Sep 30 2010, 06:04 AM
Oh and roomgate turned out fine--they're giving us an entire cottage and champagne.
Sweet!!
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doubledare
Shunnnnn the unbeliever. Shunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.
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Hurry up and get married so we can see pictures. I loved looking at JTM's pictures and need to see more from happy events!
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