Welcome Guest [Log In] [Register]
Welcome to The Outside Course!

You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free.


Join our community!


If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features!

Username:   Password:
Add Reply
Lying/Hiding Horse Stuff from SO's?
Topic Started: May 3 2010, 10:15 AM (838 Views)
RHowell
Member Avatar
You're BANNED!
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
So, I've noticed recently that a lot of horse women's stories (not just here, but in the real world, other boards etc) talk about horses people's SO's don't know about, fibbing about horse shows, how money is spent etc., sneaking money for horse bills etc...and I'm curious. How many people fib to their SO's about horse-related stuff? I'm pretty straight up with my SO (he sat there beside me when I was calculating my horse expenses for the year!)--only thing I try to shield him from is some of the horse show drama/pettiness, but otherwise I'm on the up and up. Now, mentioning that the shoes I'm wearing are new, that's a different story :innocent: Curious about others? Am I saying too much? :teehee:

Edited by RHowell, May 3 2010, 10:17 AM.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Little Diva
Member Avatar
You're BANNED!
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
I don't hide any of the horse stuff from mr. diva. But shoes and clothes....yes. What he doesn't know, he doesn't need to know!
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Delia
Member Avatar
You're BANNED!
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
The only horse-related thing I've hidden from Mr. Delia, you know about. :innocent: And I still have no idea why I did hide it, and I recently came clean about that. Otherwise, he knows everything, although I don't go over how much stuff costs with him. But that's no different from anything else in our household. I handle all of our finances except his 401(k) and his personal credit card.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
MayaTy02
Member Avatar
You're BANNED!
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
I handle all the bills and banking so as long as there is food on the table and gas in his car, why should he care? :teehee: Seriously, no I don't tell him anything about my horse expenses - even though they are substantially less significant that yours since we don't own a horse. But he has no clue about how much lessons are, or what it costs to show, or what new show clothes I just had to buy. It's important to note that he does not ask. I wouldn't not lie to him, but if he doesn't ask, I'm not gonna tell him. But again, I'm careful to make sure he has spending money and that we can still afford to eat and pay the mortgage.

he did ask me once recently when I was going to ride, "so, how much is this costing me?" and I was happily able to reply "nothing"...thank goodness for the kindness and generosity of Virginia's horsepeople!
Edited by MayaTy02, May 3 2010, 10:38 AM.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
JumpTheMoon
Member Avatar
Off visiting Candy Cave, be right back.
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
Theres no way I ever could. Last week, he noticed that I had a new shade of nail polish. :o If I can't get THAT past him, there's no way I could get a horse expense past him! Plus, he is by far the numbers person in our relationship, and keeps a very accurate mental calculation of where all his money is and how much throughout the month, so needless to say he will be taking care of most of the finances after we get married!

All I know how to do is spend. I got that from my mother. :teehee:
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Black Tack
Member Avatar
You're BANNED!
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
That must be her other mother :teehee:

I absolutely hate tax time. Adding the year's horse activities up just kind of stinks. :sigh:

However, no I don't fib or not divulge what I spend. I don't do that for anything in our relationship so I'm not about to start with the horse stuff. He also handles most of the finances so he would know anyway.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
OpticalIllusion
Member Avatar
You're BANNED!
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
I take care of all our finances, so he never see's anything. But at the same time, I dont hide anything.... really. I strictly use my coaching/ training fee's for my horse expenses. He has 'side income' that he uses for his computer addiction.

JTM- Mines the same way. I can buy a shirt, and put it in my closet for a few weeks to hide it, and the minute I get it out he immediately knows its new. Can get anything past him!
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Trixie
Thomas H. Cruise!
[ *  *  *  *  *  * ]
He has some idea. I don't hide it, but I don't frequently get into it either. We're pretty honest with each other about money and both pretty fiscally cautious. However, we don't have joint finances.

He was a little gobsmacked as I was trying to explain to him what board around here costs. Training, he understood the use of the trainer's time and education, etc. I don't think I could quite get him to understand the costs of entries and horse showing, though.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Indy
Member Avatar
You're BANNED!
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
Mr. I has some idea, but he doesn't know of every single penny I spend - on anything, not just the horse stuff. If he asks, I'm honest but he doesn't follow me penny for penny (plus, I carry the check book so I know more about our finances than he does). And I don't know what he spends exactly on his video games, golfing, and other activities...I have some clue, but that's about it.

Like when I showed the other week, he asked what it was going to cost, so I told truthfully $12/class plus shipping, which wasn't an amount I didn't know exactly at the time. He shrugged and that was that. Never did ask what I wound up paying for shipping, so that's between me and my pay check until further inquiry.

If it's a significant purchase, like the new boots I'm contemplating, I discuss things with him. But the new show shirt I bought last week? It was pretty, I wanted it, and that's that. I'm sure he'll notice at the next show because he was aware I only had one shirt - which he made fun of because it was pink (therefore justifying my need for a new shirt). If I owned a horse, I"m sure he'd be more interested in the finances but at this level he knows what he needs to know and that's about it.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Delia
Member Avatar
You're BANNED!
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
For Mr. D, who is non-horse husband, his concern is over the amount of time I spend doing horse stuff on weekends, rather than how much it may or may not cost. And there's no hiding how much time I spend with the horses. But I try very hard to balance things so he doesn't feel like he's getting short shrift.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
onthebit
Off visiting Candy Cave, be right back.
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
We have all joint accounts and he is a whiz at math so no, he knows just how much money my horses cost. He is a wonderful guy and I feel blessed to be married to him. Sometimes he actually encourages me to spend more money on the horses - now that he is used to how much they cost in general!
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
TarynJ
Member Avatar
Guiding your way to Candy Mountain, since 1873.
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
I'm single, and not a pro, so I just try not to think about it. :teehee: I have been known to fib about some of the costs to my mother when she's asked me. Really... I'm 35, employed, and it's none of her business! She's always been the "save every penny" type, and would be appalled if she knew what I spend on a monthly basis...
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
headlesshorseman
Member Avatar
You're BANNED!
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
Horse Flies and little white lies...............I did HIDE that I bought a horse over the internet UNTIL she was on her WAY HERE :tomato: He knew I was thinking about it...he was about a MONTH behind on the REAL TIME LINE :teehee:

Mine informed me that it costs X amount per day to have my 10 horses....I'm like COOL....I thought it was A LOT MORE.. ;)

I LOVE black shoes and Black purses....my shoes are not really that expensive...but my purses HAVE TO BE HIDDEN and used while he's at the deer lease....I usually BUY them when he's gone too :innocent: NOTE TO SELF: BIG purchases are made in the Fall.....I LOVE DEER SEASON!!!! :clap: :clap:

HH :)
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Won for Me
Is the meadow on fire?
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
I never have because it has always been my money. If someone asks me how much something costs, I say $20. Like how much did my horse trailer cost (when I had one)? $20. I don't think about it, so I am not going to figure it out for someone else.

I have never hid anything because I work and make my own money. I am not sure what it would have been like when I was married if we had a joint account...

Some SO's are happier not knowing, I think. Though, I don't know if I agree with that.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
DairyQueen2049
Member Avatar
DRAGON BREATH. DRAGGIN' BUTT
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
We talk money and horse money and horse costs alll the time.

Where do you stop and start? The horse? Saddle? Shoes? Trailer? House payment? Truck? Hay? What about plowing and grass seed? Replacement work shirts that are green goo stained? Shoes mud ruined?

I mean, where does it stop and start?

HIDE all that? ppft. WAAAYY too much to do for that nonsense.

Honesty makes everyone happy. <3
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous)
ZetaBoards - Free Forum Hosting
Fully Featured & Customizable Free Forums
Learn More · Sign-up Now
Go to Next Page
« Previous Topic · The Hay Loft · Next Topic »
Add Reply