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Need hugs; Nothing is wrong...
Topic Started: Mar 14 2008, 09:00 AM (428 Views)
Fenway
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Guiding your way to Candy Mountain, since 1873.
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I don't know how to say this without sounding like a baby...
I think it started last Sunday at the UVa basketball game. They retired Sean Singletary's jersey and having gone down to watch him play all 4 years, I somehow felt emotionally invested in him, and cried. Then I started thinking about how I sat in real seats at the games in our new arena, rather than camp out to stand on the floor in the old one. (We painted our stomachs and camped out for 7 days+ to stand right behind the baskets)
Then I started thinking about Foxfield coming up. Foxfield is like the social event of springtime for UVa students and local alumni. It's a horse race/drinking fest. I haven't gone in years but suddenly want to go. Two of my friends from school are getting married and moving away. Another, who had always wanted to go to Med school had instead decided to get his Masters in Public Health from UVa. Come to find out now, after getting his Masters, he had secretly applied to Med Schools, got in, and will be leaving too.
Now, I am thrilled to death for ALL of my friends and I think my problem is that they have all been only about an hour and a half away for years and we would talk/text/email but visits were few and far between. I think I'm regretting not spending more time with them while they were close.
Our 5 year reunion is next year. I spent the morning emailing old beaus and buddies and just feeling really teary and nostalgic. I felt this way about a year after I graduated and got really depressed for a few months. I don't handle change all that well and went through a period where I really missed school. I'm starting to feel that way again.
I have my own life now, apart from school and I'm happy. But it still just feels that a part of me is missing. Does that make sense? Does that get better with time? Or will I always have days where I'll feel like this?

Sorry this was so long-winded and sorry that it may not make sense. I think I just needed to get that out.
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Melliebay
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It'll be an adventure! We're going on an adventure!
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All normal feelings, life is a journey, there will be up times and down times, and school sounds like it was a great experience for you. The next chapter will be great! :hug: :hug: :hug:
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MissBri
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But, I don't care - it's 5:00 somewhere
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Yup - ya just got the blues

it is ok to have a pity party once in a while

BUT - I think you should host a party for all your friends that are moving on. It will be fun, give you the opportunity to really connect with each, shows them how important they are to you, and again, it will be fun. Give all little tasks for the party - burn a cd with all the old favorite songs, bring lots of pics from the years together (this is especially fun cause you will trade and swap).
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headlesshorseman
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You're BANNED!
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GIRL, enjoy those times..and just ADD to them..

It sounds like you had a great time at THE University of Virginia..and that you did have a an emotional connection with Sean Singletary...I bet he was awesome to watch..any who...you did INVEST 4 or 5 YEARS of your life there..and it was time well spent..as well as lots of $$$$$$ spent.. :teehee: :teehee:

Your Book is FAR from being finished..just create a new chapter..Title it whatever you wish....you don't have to write in ORANGE and NAVY...well Navy is a great color...ok...

Just go forth young woman..enjoy..

HH :)

Edit to say...YOU ARE BANNED!!!!
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3Bays
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:hug: Understood, Fenway! No, you're not crazy...having those "nostalgic" feelings and having the sensation that something is missing or lost...very normal. Mellie's right...this will happen again, also, about other aspects and times of your life.

I can look back on various "sections" of my life with the same feelings you described...many times I've gone to my photo albums and memorabilia and "walked down memory lane" when in the mood. It's always a bittersweet feeling...the good times I miss, I think over decisions or regrets, I wonder where those people are now and long for aspects of that time in my life. I would imagine fifteen years from now I'll be reminiscing about THIS period of my life and feeling bittersweet about it!

I think you'll find your life is a series of "chapters" and you'll always look back with fondness or longing over previous parts of the Book Of Your Life. Go ahead and indulge this once in a while...just don't get stuck there so you cannot go on to make a NEW chapter! ;) :cheer:
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Indy
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:hug: :hug:

I feel ya'. I went through similar feelings this time last year (right before my college 5 year too). It'll pass, just keep moving forwards and keep the good memories of school in your head. You'll get through it.

:hug: :hug:
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DairyQueen2049
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DRAGON BREATH. DRAGGIN' BUTT
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AWwww Fenny :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

How wonderful that you know the value of your good friends!!!

I second the have a party suggestion and just think: new places for you to visit and explore and take vacations at on the CHEAP!

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

Change is hard - but you do have a choice how you are going to deal with it. Its okay to be weepy - but try to think of the good stuff too.

How exciting for all of them too!!!
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Fenway
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Guiding your way to Candy Mountain, since 1873.
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Thanks guys. The party is a great idea. It can be like a blast-off party before bigger and better things.
These people were my family for 4 years and I adore them.
And for the ones that I haven't stayed as close to, I think I'm going to try to reconnect with them. I don't want to look back and have any relationship regrets...
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ElonGrad1997
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Magical Leopluridon
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Fennie... you are totally normal. Look at my screen name for Toms Sake! It's been ELEVEN YEARS! I get choked up thinking about it. The worst for me, is going to homecoming to see friends. It's great when we get there on Friday, but then Sunday comes and we all go to a farewell breakfast. We all cry every time. Elon is in NC, so friends go back to PA, MD, VA, GA and FL.

BUT...we all fall back into life's routines and it's all okay again. We have started having reunions off-campus and for some reason, it's a lot easier not being back but seeing the same faces. Look at us! Graduates of 1996 and 1997 STILL getting together 11/12 years later. God willing, you will see everyone again...and again...and again. Oh, and when you do go back, it's like you never left! Which is why the last day is so hard. :hug: :hug: :hug:

Let me also mention...myspace and facebook have been a great way to reconnect with fellow alums. It has really helped seeing that they're still out there not lost. :cloud9:
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vxf111
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Everyone gets the blues sometimes. The sun will be coming through the clouds anytime now. :hug:
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FlashGordon
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Hugs to you. It's perfectly ok to be a bit blah.... sounds like you're missing a time in your life that was really special to you.

I second the Facebook idea if you aren't on it already. My old friends and I talk now more than ever, since we are able to keep up with each other's lives via Facebook.

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OTF
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Fenway, have you ever read "Passages" by Gail Sheehy? It's all about the different stages we go through and a good read.

On a side note, I've only been to the Foxfield Races a couple of times and not recently, but I remember it BEFORE it was a race course. It was Grover Vandevender's place, where lots of kids rode every afternoon and had a blast! He was like Santa Claus to us. You stirred up some old memories for me, so I looked and found this history of Foxfield:

http://www.virginiasportsman.com/Foxfield.pdf

Scroll down a bit and you'll see a photo of three legends: William Faulkner, Grover Vandevender, and George Barkley. George Barkley did a lot of photography at local shows way back in the 60s. I didn't know Mr. Faulkner.


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Black Tack
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:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

I really don't find it strange at all that a party would be the recommended fix :clap: Makes alot of sense to me :cheer: :cheer: :cheer:
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Fenway
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Guiding your way to Candy Mountain, since 1873.
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OTF
Mar 14 2008, 10:56 AM
Fenway, have you ever read "Passages" by Gail Sheehy? It's all about the different stages we go through and a good read.

On a side note, I've only been to the Foxfield Races a couple of times and not recently, but I remember it BEFORE it was a race course. It was Grover Vandevender's place, where lots of kids rode every afternoon and had a blast! He was like Santa Claus to us. You stirred up some old memories for me, so I looked and found this history of Foxfield:

http://www.virginiasportsman.com/Foxfield.pdf

Scroll down a bit and you'll see a photo of three legends: William Faulkner, Grover Vandevender, and George Barkley. George Barkley did a lot of photography at local shows way back in the 60s. I didn't know Mr. Faulkner.

Nope, I haven't but I will now. And very cool, I'd never seen that before. Thanks, OTF. :)
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Fenway
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Guiding your way to Candy Mountain, since 1873.
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I do use Facebook. A few of my friends signed up our 4th year when it was only a few schools. At the time, I thought it was dumb (I had IM, why would I need facebook?) and I actually only got an account because my roommate filled out all of the info for me.
I love it now though. Feel free to add me: Beth Watson UVa '04 ;)

Rob and I talk about moving to Cville every time we are down there (which is pretty often considering we have football and basketball season tickets). I LOVE it there. I'm one of those die-hard college alumni. I LOVE my school and I think, in a way, my experience there defined who I am.

And thanks for all of the kind words and hugs. You guys are great. :)
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