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For The Milkman (Mr. DQ) and LF !!!
Topic Started: Mar 12 2008, 05:48 AM (261 Views)
jillincolorado
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You're BANNED!
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MAN RULES:

The Man Rules­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
Finally , the guys' side of the story.
( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear " the rules "
From the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1.Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both..
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows defaul t settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear. :lol:

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or motor sports

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Fenway
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Guiding your way to Candy Mountain, since 1873.
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.


:jaw:


I love the crying one too--so true. Rob freaks any time I cry. (Maybe because it happens so infrequently!)

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that. :rolleyes:
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Reynard Ridge
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Drivin' The Short Bus
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:clap:

Totally loved those!

Men, the WYSIWYG gender. :yes:

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SnackPack
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You're BANNED!
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Heheeee.

I like #1

:P

Oh wait, this one:

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

Otherwise known as the CYA clause
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LostFarmer
Magical Leopluridon
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Reynard Ridge
Mar 12 2008, 06:15 AM
:clap:

Totally loved those!

Men, the WYSIWYG gender. :yes:

Thats right. The worst is my nearly 12 yo daughter is trying to learn the game. She started yelling at the boys for the toilet seat deal. I shut that down. We have a rule in our house. If you want me to lift it, then you be willing to put it down. Otherwise we will just leave it down. :innocent:

Crying is so not fair. LF
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DairyQueen2049
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DRAGON BREATH. DRAGGIN' BUTT
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1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both..
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

That is Mr DQ's fave. :teehee:

Very excellent post!!! :one: :one:
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MissBri
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But, I don't care - it's 5:00 somewhere
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Reynard Ridge
Mar 12 2008, 09:15 AM
:clap:

Totally loved those!

Men, the WYSIWYG gender. :yes:

duh what is WYSIWYG?

oh wait.....


what you see is what you get???????

love it
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