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Any adults have parents living with them?
Topic Started: Feb 10 2008, 12:15 PM (188 Views)
FlashGordon
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So the question is... who currently has a parent(s) living with them, in the same house/property? How has the arrangement worked?

My mom is living alone in the house we grew up in, which is very big and very empty now! She is turning 60 this year and is struggling with maintaining the house, and she also worries about her financial position. She is reluctant to downsize and leave the family home, but cannot stay there on her own any longer.

Hubby and I live in a small home in a quaint village about 15 minutes away. We like our life here and we love the community. But, with a young daughter, we are finding that our little 2 bedroom is bursting at the seasm.

For a variety of reasons, the idea of us moving into my mom's house has come onto the table. There's certainly more than enough room, and the house is in a lovely neighborhood. We'd be contributing to the upkeep/utilities/mortgage. We'd probably be there for awhile, and then we would like to buy land and build a home w/ an adjoining in-law set-up for my mom.

My biggest concern is the close proximity.... we all need our space (ok, well I do!) and though I love my mom she can at times drive me crazy! Hubby is insanely laid-back and she doesn't bother him one bit, but I can be pretty irritated by her at times. (horrible I know but hey I am sure a lot of moms and daughters are like that!)

But, knowing she is close by would also be a huge bonus... the maintenance and financial burden for her would be alleviated, I would never have to worry about her, and she'd have a comfortable retirement.

Any positive/negative feedback is welcome.
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Lawndart
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Thankfully, no. We love both parents, but...

I have several friends who have taken in a parent or in-law, and they have both told me DON"T DO IT!! But their situations are a little bit different then yours.

Would it be possible to trade houses with her? So she would have her own space, at least until she is physically unable to care for herself? Or would she hate that idea?

Another thing would be if you would be together 52 weeks a year. If she could live with another sibling for a couple of weeks a year, it might make a huge difference.
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naters
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Switch houses maybe???

My grandfather is currently living with my parents, and I would say that your stress level totally will depend on how much care (helping change, baths, wet sheets, etc) that your mother needs...

Will post more later....
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naters
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Lawndart: great minds think alike!!! :lol:
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FlashGordon
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Hey thanks guys!

Yeah my biggest worry is the tension it might cause..... she is very overbearing at times!

The house swap is a neat idea. :)
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Lawndart
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naters
Feb 10 2008, 04:25 PM
Lawndart: great minds think alike!!! :lol:

And at the same time too! :lol:
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