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The Latest Home Defense System
Topic Started: Dec 14 2005, 08:56 PM (582 Views)
Icefox
Scum
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Introducing the latest in Home Defense System technology - the 'Safe Bedside Table'

http://www.jamesmcadam.co.uk/portfolio_html/sb_table.html

What little faith I have left in humanity is telling me this isn't real, but still, I must wonder.

What KIND of intruders are you expecting with this kind of device, anyway? Orcs?
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Feldoon
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DYEL
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Or just have said items spare, laying near your bed maybe.

Just maybe.
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demishock
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Natural Selection
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But that kind of defeats the purpose of having a table... because you can't put anything on it... because then if you need it, it's got stuff on it... x . x Where do people come up with this stuff?
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Jeffk38uk
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Everything's great at your Junes.
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Got to give points for originality though.
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TheHypnoScreenOfEN
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My name is supposed to say "TheHypnoScreenOven"
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This isn't real. This can't be real. If this is real I will eat my own shoe....My shoe is very dirty just for reference and has a smell which could kill an elephant...And nothing to make it taste better.
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Feldoon
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DYEL
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Jeffk38uk,Dec 14 2005
10:34 PM
Got to give points for originality though.

Negative three.
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Hercule Pyro
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You've done some terrible things, Mister Harry
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Icefox,Dec 14 2005
08:56 PM
What KIND of intruders are you expecting with this kind of device, anyway? Orcs?

Threats of the Horde raiding your town are no laughing matter... You could be minding your own business when suddenly a mass of orcs with variations on the name "Lurtz" are in your base, killing your dudes.
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Major Maxillary
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Anarcho-Fascist
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I'm probably gonna get flamed for this, but if you find yourself buying breakdown furniture to fight off intruders, it's time to rethink your position on the local weapons laws.
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Feldoon
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Major Maxillary,Dec 14 2005
11:47 PM
I'm probably gonna get flamed for this, but if you find yourself buying breakdown furniture to fight off intruders, it's time to rethink your position on the local weapons laws.

It's within the law to do to people what they're willing to do to you.

So, next time you shoot someone, but an un-marked gun in their hand and claim they were gonna do it.
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HunteRS
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Power is all that is needed.
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I find this deeply amusing. For one as table it doesn't look that damn stable. Secondly-this comes from a guy who's designed it for people in London "worried about security and sleep." I honestly didn't tink there was an individual in London that wasn't packing at least a Baseball bat or an iron poker. Besides most individuals I know have thier own methods of dealing with intruders, ranging from the legal (mace + kick to nuts.) to the Not legal in the slightest (Home made flamethrower.)

Quote:
 
I'm probably gonna get flamed for this, but if you find yourself buying breakdown furniture to fight off intruders, it's time to rethink your position on the local weapons laws.


Not from me though. Tony Martin was right-your homes your castle and any horde wannabe who breaks in deseves what they get in my opinion.
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Dark Comet
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Hoo am I
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A combination of a nine iron golf club and a suitably stout stick will dissuade most wannabe burglers.

But even so, an aesthetically functional table that doubles as an item of clobbering? It's worthy of memphis.
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death's_minion
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Rank of Some Significance
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That would SO go on my X-mas list. :D
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Major Maxillary
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I'll stick with Mariah here, Thank you very much.
Posted Image

if anyone wants to take soemthing from my home, they'll have to first speak with Mariah.

And Mariah always has the final say.
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death's_minion
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Rank of Some Significance
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Do you sleep with Mariah?
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Major Maxillary
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Anarcho-Fascist
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She's a tiger in the sack.
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sephirothq
Blood! There's blood in my pants!!!
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Silly. It's not for defense! It's so you can have tea, and then
rush out and clobber the children on your street in your own pretend
RPG! :P
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Jax Fox
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Let's stupid Lothar!
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sephirothq,Dec 16 2005
08:04 PM
Silly.  It's not for defense!  It's so you can have tea, and then
rush out and clobber the children on your street in your own pretend
RPG!

As much as I like the idea of doing so, I doubt it'd be legal. :D

Now really, I know humanity's gone insane as I know of it, but this is...odd. Not as odd as the Hello Kitty dildos, though...
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Captain Wonderful
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Enjoy piracy responsibly
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I forward the motion that the entire world should be converted into RPG-style medieval tomfoolery. I want to carry a +2 bastard sword wherever I go and talk to peasants and stout yeomen. Scientists should be renamed as wizards, and there should be orcs everywhere.

On rethinking, that's really sad.
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demishock
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Natural Selection
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Captain Wonderful,Dec 16 2005
09:08 PM
I forward the motion that the entire world should be converted into RPG-style medieval tomfoolery. I want to carry a +2 bastard sword wherever I go and talk to peasants and stout yeomen. Scientists should be renamed as wizards, and there should be orcs everywhere.

On rethinking, that's really sad.

Still, it WOULD shake things up a bit in ye olde boring Real Life...

That, and in RPG!Land it's perfectly okay to maim the stupid people... and the bodies just disappear - no disposal necessary!

>.>

<.<

T_T;

*goes back to studying*
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Vigilante
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Neurosurgeon
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QUOTE (Captain Wonderful @ Dec 16 2005, 09:08 PM)
Quote:
 
I forward the motion that the entire world should be converted into RPG-style medieval tomfoolery. I want to carry a +2 bastard sword wherever I go and talk to peasants and stout yeomen. Scientists should be renamed as wizards, and there should be orcs everywhere.

On rethinking, that's really sad.


I could live with that only if it was real time and not Final Fantasy RPG style, imagine being whisked off for a random battle ever 3 steps to fight something that wasn't there, i'd practically throw up every time the screen whirls round then i'd be in no state to battle.
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Captain Wonderful
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Enjoy piracy responsibly
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You wouldn't be allowed to just hurt people any more. You'd have to smite. Verily.
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Jax Fox
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Let's stupid Lothar!
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Captain Wonderful,Dec 17 2005
07:45 PM
You wouldn't be allowed to just hurt people any more. You'd have to smite. Verily.

It's making me desire such a roleplay world. The world is so cruel. I must smite! x____x

On topic...and off almost as much. Buying the table could be a big save. Just grab a chair, have some random battles using your club and wooden shield...then, relax and have coffee on your new table. =3
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SoniCalvin
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Not afraid of anything
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Major Maxillary,Dec 15 2005
08:49 PM
I'll stick with Mariah here, Thank you very much.
Posted Image

if anyone wants to take soemthing from my home, they'll have to first speak with Mariah.

And Mariah always has the final say.


Major Maxillary,Dec 16 2005
03:53 AM
She's a tiger in the sack.


Those references alone remind me too much of Calvin and Hobbes.

"My friend made three profound arguments, and then I left the room. I always leave, whenever the talk gets philosophical."

But yeah, this so-called Home Defense System looks stupid.

...lemme rephrase that. It's cool, but life-threatening, as an intruder could easily have a gun. :<_<: It can go right through the freakin' table, and into your arm, or your heart!
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Spinmaster
Banned
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It's always gunplay with you guys...

I'll be waiting when Mariah runs out of bullets. :D

Points for resourcefulness.
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Omegaultima
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It wasn't me, it was the post above.
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Spinmaster,Dec 19 2005
01:31 AM
It's always gunplay with you guys...

I'll be waiting when Mariah runs out of bullets. :D

Then you can use it as a club, either way resourcefulness but I doubt anyone would be willing to kill another person with a gun.

Points for resourcefullness as you said. Hell, saves breaking furniture to beat off some punk on your property.
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