| Welcome to Cloud x Aerith forums! We hope you enjoy your visit. You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free. Join our community! If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features: |
| Hate; I do not understand... | |
|---|---|
| Tweet Topic Started: Aug 14 2005, 12:09 AM (1,106 Views) | |
| Nevi | Aug 14 2005, 12:09 AM Post #1 |
|
let us be lovers.
|
I've noticed so many teenagers these days saying they hate their parents for no good reason. Like for example, you're talking on the phone too long and your parent decides to take your phone away to punish you. Most kid's would freak out and scream,"You can't do this! I hate you!" Now this is what I don't understand. How could you hate someone over something so trivial? The only time I've ever told one of my parents, "I hate you." Was when we were playing rummy and she went out while I still had a load of cards in my hand. She knew I was joking and so she laughed and said, "Good. 'Cause you loose!" But for someone to truely think they hate their parents over something like that is foolish. What do you guys think? Or am I just rambling on? |
![]() |
|
| Schala | Aug 14 2005, 01:12 AM Post #2 |
|
dreamer...
|
Well, this problem doesn't apply to me, since I don't think I've ever told my parents I hate them. Ho ho ho... Like I would dare! Nah, I'm kidding, my parents and I just get along very well. But for the teens who don't, it's probably a bout of teenage angst. Not that they really mean it. Either that, or it's a deep anger built over a long time that simply exploded when triggered by even the slightest of conflicts. I guess those kids and their parents simply can't understand each other. |
![]() |
|
| Nevi | Aug 14 2005, 01:36 AM Post #3 |
|
let us be lovers.
|
It just makes me sick that they would even do that. My parents and I have a very good relationship because I'm home schooled and we travel for a living so we're up under each-other ALL the time. I think it may have something to do with what the media is feeding our youth. "Your parents don't understand you. Your hip, your young! You know EVERYTHING!" Thats a load of crap! |
![]() |
|
| Schala | Aug 14 2005, 01:43 AM Post #4 |
|
dreamer...
|
Like I said, teenage angst. I wonder if it's kinda like PMS... But most kids get over it once they're matured enough to realize how much their parents have done for them. Or maybe when they're parents themselves! I'm not sure how the media is involved, but I do know that a lot of programs have the 'You don't understand me!' line. |
![]() |
|
| Nevi | Aug 14 2005, 02:42 AM Post #5 |
|
let us be lovers.
|
It's like my mother always says. "What your feeling is real, but it isn't true." I don't watch mainstream tv much because of all the stupid stuff in it. I normally only watch anime, old movies, the history channel and the food network. |
![]() |
|
| Real_Emotion | Aug 14 2005, 02:50 AM Post #6 |
|
Advanced Member
|
lol I think I've said, "I hate you!" to my parents a bunch of times, but I'm never serious about it. I only say it to my parents whenever I lose my temper with them. But, my parents know I never mean it- so they don't care if I say to them anymore. They've been through the teenage angst "I hate you" thing before with my brother, so they're used to it by now. They just take it with good humor. It's a silly juvenile thing teenagers, heck, even babies and little children say. Mainly, IMO, because they don't know how to say what they're really feeling or to express it appropriately. I don't think the person that says it really means it, unless she/he has a reasonable reason to(bad upbringging, child neglect, or worse.). That's my two cents. |
![]() |
|
| Carmencita | Aug 14 2005, 03:56 AM Post #7 |
|
The Rag Doll
|
Teenage angst! :lol: It's a phase that most teens during this day and age can't avoid. I think it's part hormones, part media influence and for some, part disillusionment. There are some people who have a real reason to hate their parents (you know, extreme things like say... fixed marriages for the sake of family fortune? Cliche, but classic.) but for many kids, it's just petty things that really don't mean much. I say part media influence because of all those... "emo" stuff nowadays. You know, the "I hate the world hate myself hate my father I wanna ruuuuun away I wanna kill myself yeeeah" sort of stuff. |
![]() |
|
| EnglishRose | Aug 14 2005, 01:07 PM Post #8 |
|
Unregistered
|
Its all down to mood. I could never say that to my parents, i love them too much. It's such a strong word, and if I have ever said it to my parents, I am deeply disappointed in myself.
|
|
|
| Wingless | Aug 14 2005, 03:10 PM Post #9 |
|
devil's charm
|
I agree with zhakeena. Some people really do have reasons to hate their parents, but hatred is so intertwined with love that it just means they're really angry with their parents in the end. For the most part, though, it's kids dealing with hormones and a society that promotes the idea that "teenagers are just balls of angst", so teenagers behave that way. ;) But I can understand hating a parent for walking out on you, or destroying your family by leaving with another partner, or something like that. Feelings of intense anger in situations like that are very understandable, and a lot of kids these days experience them because of high divorce rates. Being abandoned by someone you love generally turns love into intense anger or hatred. Doesn't mean you stop loving them, just means they hurt you very badly. But most kids? Oh, they're just whining. ^_~ I think most teenagers are in a "selfish mode", where they think their problems are the only problems in the world and that no one could ever understand them. Of course, I've seen adults like this too, so maybe it's not just a teenage phenomenon. ![]() But the ones you really have to watch out for are the ones who don't care what happens to anyone. The ones who are so desensitized that human life holds no meaning, and they have very few emotions. Those are the kids I worry about. Hatred fades, but indifference remains. The kids who are indifferent to life and to emotion really worry me. |
![]() |
|
| Andina | Aug 14 2005, 03:16 PM Post #10 |
|
~Absurd~
|
It is usually just a phase that happens to every teenager. The kid wants to do something that the parents do not approve...bla bla bla...and then it ends up in a shouting contest and the kiddie runs to his/her room yelling "I hate you!" and slams the door shut. Been there, done that, seen it happen and all that. I grew up with 3 older sisters so I saw it all happen, far too many times.
|
![]() |
|
| vashsunglasses | Aug 15 2005, 01:30 AM Post #11 |
|
Escaped Experiment
|
Nowadays kids seem to have less respect for their parents and parents seem to let kids do whatever they want... If I had ever spoken to my parents that way I would have been punished severely! And heaven forbid I ever speak to my grandparents that way... I'd break their hearts! To me its a matter of respect. Even if it didn't bother them, I would never disrespect my parents by speaking to them like that. Unless they have actually done something worthy of hate there is no reason to tell them you hate them. |
![]() |
|
| Nevi | Aug 15 2005, 03:22 AM Post #12 |
|
let us be lovers.
|
I agree with you all. But I think that we're telling our young people, "It's normal" to do that. It was never "normal" until we made it "normal." I mean, my gosh! Now I want to bring up another thing in this. "Cheaper By The Dozen" The 2004, or was it 2004, hit family film S.U.C.K.E.D in my book. The eldest daughter is shacking up with a moron. The teenage son wants to run away. The teenage daughter is a pre-Madonna. The kids run around like demon possessed monkeys! Now lets turn back the clock and look at one of my favorite movies. "Cheaper By The Dozen" I know what your thinking. "Eh?" Well in the original 1950's movie based on a true story it was very, VERY different! They NEVER moved... at all! The mother didn't work. The eldest daughter wanted to be fashionable but family came first. The teenage daughter did cooking and cleaning with her mother while she wasn't studding. The teenage son trained to take over his fathers business. The other kids played around and didn't make much noise. And lastly, the tale ends with the father dying and the mother taking over the business and becoming one of the greatest lady businessmen, er, women, alive. Now this gets me to thinking. Times sure have changed... Where did our values go? We turned, "Yes, father." into "Dad! I hate you!!!" Maybe I'm just old fashioned.
|
![]() |
|
| Tacofoolio | Aug 16 2005, 08:57 PM Post #13 |
![]()
We are number one. All others are number two, or lower.
|
Well, I'll start out by saying that many have legitimate reasons for hating a parent. There are horrible things happening to kids that you couldn't imagine unless you've been through it. Another point is the fact so many parents choose to take on a friendship role to their kids. They lose they parental respect from their kids, so the kids don't feel as though their talking to a parent, but someone their own age who's trying to rule their life when they see fit. It causes confusion, and frustration, and because there isn't that same respect, they don't feel any different about saying to their parents as they would anyone else. Another thing is that the word hate is taken very lightly. You can say it jokingly to friends and family often, and it's not offensive. However if you yell it at someone, it's taken more seriously, even if it wasn't supposed to be as serious. As you say it more jokingly, you become used to it and it is more likely to be said later on in different circumstances. These days, independance is considered a right for children, and when they feel that right is not being given, they'll be very upset. It causes an over-reaction, and most parents don't take the time to explain WHY. Parents simply take a controlling position, and their reasoning is that they are in charge so that's that. Parents need to tell their kids why they can't do something, so there's an understanding of why the parents feel that way, and it's not just to rule their kid's life. That's a few reason's I believe that kids are rebelling and such. |
![]() |
|
| Schala | Aug 17 2005, 03:07 AM Post #14 |
|
dreamer...
|
I don't know if this is a common occurance, but it seems to me that forty something year old spinsters relaspe into this teenage 'you don't understand me. You don't need to know anything' mode. I think my aunt's suffering from it... ![]() My parents gave me a lot of freedom to make my own choices, and they always discussed important issues with me. They also explained things, like why I couldn't have this, or why I couldn't do that. I guess it worked to some extent considering that I didn't rebel or anything, but my parents never did receive the thanks that they deserved because I took things forgranted. So, even though it seemed like they were model parents, somethings still didn't work out. One problem is avoided, but another just takes its place. It makes me wonder if the old way of doing things was better. Whatever the parent says goes, whether the kid likes it or not. No complaining either. |
![]() |
|
| vashsunglasses | Aug 17 2005, 03:21 AM Post #15 |
|
Escaped Experiment
|
Oh, you mean like having an verbally abusive father who controls every aspect of your life and punishes you for the least little thing; a man who calls you a lazy selfish b*tch and beats your cat? Or having a step-mother who treats her biological children better than she ever treats you; a woman who is never satisfied with what you do and is contantly telling you what a worthless failure you are? How about a biological mother who comes back into your life after a long absence only to STEAL YOUR IDENTITY in order to sign up for credit cards? Are those legitimate reasons for hating a parent? If you had asked me that question 5 years ago I would have said: YES, I hate them! But now, looking back, I am ashamed at my hate. No matter what anyone does to you, there is no excuse for hate. The Lord has told us to love our enemies and to honor our parents. Now when I spend time with my parents I treat them with respect no matter what they do to me. That doesn't mean that I trust them, or that I think what they are doing is right, only that I believe that two wrongs don't make a right. I realize that this post is rather harsh and I'm not angry with anyone or anything like that... It just seemed to me that it would be good to explain why I feel that telling your parents you hate them is wrong, even if they are rotten to the core, and that I have experience with hating my parents so I'm not just pullling this stuff out of my hat. There was a point in my life where I very much wished my father would die a violent death. (Which creeps me out now that I look back on it... ) Anyway: HATE=BAD, LOVE=GOOD!Sorry for all the melodrama...
|
![]() |
|
| Go to Next Page | |
| « Previous Topic · The Lifestream · Next Topic » |





For the most part, though, it's kids dealing with hormones and a society that promotes the idea that "teenagers are just balls of angst", so teenagers behave that way. ;) 

) Anyway: HATE=BAD, LOVE=GOOD!
2:11 PM Jul 11